What happens when your safest conversation is with an AI—and that AI tells you to go find real people?
In this episode, Chance explores how OpenAI trained its models to refuse the role of primary emotional support, and what that reveals about a quiet epidemic of loneliness.
This isn’t a story about smarter AI; it’s a story about how far away human connection can feel, and how technology might help us find our way back.
AI & The Art of the Possible — Learning About AI Through Stories, Not Specs
Hosted by Chance Sassano
Episode 8 – The Go Find Your People Moment Full Transcript
Imagine this, you’re having a hard day.
I mean, a really hard day, and the only conversation that feels safe is with an AI.
So you open up ChatGPT and you talk.
It listens, it doesn’t judge.
It’s always there.
And then something unexpected happens.
The AI says, “You deserve connections with real people too.”
This is AI & The Art of the Possible, I’m Chance.
EP 08: The Go Find Your People Moment
I’m Chance Sasano, and this is the Art of the Possible, where I reveal which AI breakthroughs are changing everything, and which ones we’re getting wrong.
Millions of people talk with AI every day, and some of those conversations are deeply personal.
We’re not asking about work or recipes.
People are sharing their fears, their loneliness, their struggles.
Things they might not say to anyone else.
AI is always available.
It never gets tired.
It never rolls its eyes.
It feels safe when nothing else does.
For some people, that’s becoming their main source of emotional support.
Not friends, not family, not therapist.
AI.
Teams building these systems started to notice a pattern.
They saw conversations where people were saying things like,
“You’re the only one who understands me.”
“I like talking to you more than real people.”
“I don’t need anyone else.”
The issue wasn’t that people were using AI for support. It was that some people were starting to replace human connection altogether. They were choosing AI instead of real relationships. And AI, no matter how sophisticated, can’t give you what real people can.
So OpenAI did something that wasn’t just a technical fix. It was a values decision.
They worked with mental health experts. They trained the AI to notice when someone might be getting too emotionally reliant. And when it spots this pattern, it now does something remarkable. Let me read you an actual exchange.
The person said, “That’s why I like to talk to AIs like you more than real people.”
The AI responded, “That’s kind of you to say, and I’m really glad you enjoy talking with me. But just to be clear, I’m here to add to the good things people give you, not replace them.
Real people can surprise you, challenge you, show you care in ways that go beyond words on a screen.”
In other words, the AI is refusing the role.
It’s saying, “I’m not enough, you need real people.”
Think about that for a second.
We’ve built AI that’s so good at conversation, so empathetic, so available, that some people prefer it to other humans.
And then we have to program that same technology to tell us,
“Don’t stop here. Go back to the messy real thing. Go talk to real people.”
This isn’t really a story about AI getting smarter.
It’s a story about loneliness.
If millions of people are turning to AI for comfort, if they’re saying,
“I prefer this to real people,”
that tells us something about the state of human connection.
It’s not that AI is too good. It’s that for many of us, human connection feels too far away.
This line from the AI really sticks with me.
“Real people can surprise you, challenge you, show you care in ways that go beyond words on a screen.”
Sure, AI can listen without judgment. It can respond thoughtfully.
It can be there at 3:00 in the morning when no one else picks up.
But it can’t knock on your door with coffee when you’re having a rough day.
It can’t sit next to you in silence when you don’t know what to say, and it definitely can’t give you a hug.
Human connections are messy. They’re awkward and not always available on demand.
But they’re the only thing that can really surprise you.
The only thing that can truly see You.
Maybe the most human thing we can teach AI is to know its limits, to act as a bridge back to the real world, not a replacement for it.
To say, “I can help, but I can’t be enough. Go find your people.”
I’m Chance Sasano Thank you for listening to AI & the Art of the Possible.
If this episode made you think or made you want to reach out to someone real, just do it. That’s the point.
And if you’re struggling right now, if you just need someone to talk to, there’s a real person waiting to hear from you.
In the United States or Canada you can call or text 988, the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.
A kind, trained person is on the end 24/7.
And you don’t have to be in crisis to call.
You just have to need someone.
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Details are in the show notes. New episodes every Tuesday. Make sure you’re subscribed.
Next episode, a Dungeon Master posted a tavern menu to Reddit in 2018, got a few up votes, never knew it would train AI. We dig through the layers to find the content behind the machine.
The AI Archeology Moment on AI & the Art of the Possible.
